All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
