It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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