Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize