This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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