love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
