just survived the first fart of the relationship.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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