That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
