And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
