therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
