He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Randomize
