why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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