So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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