just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
