just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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