It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
