Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize