something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
