READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
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