Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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