my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
false alarm. still invincible.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
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