CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
