I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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