Your face is a jimmy john
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
The uberlube is also flammable
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
