I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
