Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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