just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
There r osticjed everywhere
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
