I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Randomize