I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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