You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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