The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
