I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Randomize