Whod you bang
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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