The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Randomize
