; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
