dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
