i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
