i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
