the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
