That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
