I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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