Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
