We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Randomize
