I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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