So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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