Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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