We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
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