hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
