is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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