yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
