Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Where is the hickey?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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