You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
