wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
