Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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